My life, I can't help getting the feeling that it just goes down hill from here. The really shitty part about that is that hasn't ever really reached any great heights from which to decline from. You know what I mean ?
I haven't discovered a new antibiotic that will kill these super bugs we have in the hospitals or found a new species of animal, never climbed K2 or Everest, jumped out of a plane, wrote the next great Canadian novel, I haven't even come up with a plan for peace in the middle east yet, well not one that would get world wide acceptance anyway. Nope, I've just lived an ordinary life like any ordinary person....SO HOW THE HELL CAN IT GO DOWN HILL !!!
Oh, in reality I know it could be so much worse and that I am very fortunate to have the life I do. I could be a black woman living in Africa, the fear of rape and starvation a daily burden. Watching my children starve or being abducted and forced to become gorilla mercenaries and kill their own family, or watching them die of HIV/aids, worse yet that I would die of aids and leave my children to starve alone.
I could be a Muslim woman living in Iraq or Afghanistan, forced to cover myself from head to toe so some dumb ass creep won't be tempted. Denied an education or the chance to work (other than as a slave) simply because I was born without testicles.
See this works, because I am feeling better about my life already.
I guess what I want to know is how do some people get to be one of those people that go through life with little to no drama, they tend to be not very observant about what goes on around them and thus have little stress in their life. I know they exist because I know several people like that. Oh...the bliss.
I notice everything, I worry about everything and everyone. It sucks, it's draining and I don't want to do it anymore....so where do I go to trade it in on a non caring, unobservant personality type. Just point me in the right direction and I'm there baby !
It's Easter Sunday and Robert is outside feeding cattle and grinding grain. I am of course sitting in front of the computer writing dribble on my blog whilst my chicken roasts away in the oven. For dessert I made O calorie Jello in two colours and will cut it into cubes and put it in a fancy dessert glass with a spoon of cool whip , c'est magnifique ! This is Robert after he eats turkey so we are having chicken instead so he can go back outside later and not hurt himself by being half asleep from the turkey enzyme that makes you drowsy.
An update on the saga that is my son...... I got a call from the local Health Unit about them trying to get a hold of "the girlfriend". They were desperate apparently and so had finally contacted me since she put me down as her contact person. When I was taking her to the doctors and such during the whole "pregnancy" episode they did blood tests. Well, they didn't know she had terminated and so were a bit relieved since they had, via the blood tests, found out she is Rubella negative. She had been vaccinated as a kid but she was still negative and if she had come in contact with someone who had the measles etc...while pregnant she could become ill but worse the baby could be born with birth defects. huh.... anyway they wanted me to tell her to go immediately to them for re-vaccination. I gave them her number at work and asked to be left out of it. I still have not forgiven them for putting me through hell. I have never been so torn in two as I was then.
The good news is: my son has said he found a job, and will start tomorrow, working for a fellow that builds houses. I hope he can keep it for a while since it is the type of job I have wanted him to have for a while now. I know you are thinking I don't have very high aspirations for my son but this is why I think he would really like this type of work:
When he was little, like 4 or 5 until we moved from our farm near Barrhead he has loved to cut wood and build things. In his dad's shop he was never under his dad's feet when he was working on the tractors or truck, asking questions or wanting to help, he was always off in the wood working corner with a piece of wood in the vise and a hand saw, cutting that big piece of wood into little pieces. When he got a bit older he would nail the pieces together, making bird houses, feeders, boats, go carts, tree houses and secret forts and helped me design and build nests for the hens to lay eggs in.
So I still have hope , which surprised me, because I thought I had used it all up by now. After all, Jesus wasn't a Doctor, a Lawyer or a computer technician, he was a carpenter, a worker of wood. So I hope that my son might find a bit of contentment at last in doing something familiar and comforting.
Somebody forgot to tell this bunny that it is the eggs he's suppose to hide not himself.
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